BUSY IN BED, LYING TO MY HUSBAND AND BULLETS
Posted earlier today on Letterdash.
I am exhausting in bed.
This is what Old Spouse told me over our early-morning coffee today. Evidently; while I sleep, I am very active. Amongst other things, I:
Gnash my teeth,
Jerk my arms and legs about like Beyonce in that music video all the blokes are copying, and – most alarmingly –
Sometimes stop breathing completely!
He says he can live with most of the things, but the stopping-breathing alarms him and causes him to stay alert so that he can poke me in the arm to get the breathing going again, which leaves him quite tired when morning comes.
Apparently this is called Sleep Apnea and could indicate a dangerous heart condition and he has pleaded with me to get more aerobic exercise; please, when you walk Original Bunn to school, take a little extra time and walk a few more kms, it’s that simple … I assured him I will.
But I lied.
I lied because I am waiting, waiting in terror for an attack that I know is coming; it is just a matter of time. I break out in a cold sweat every time I venture out. Every day I am bombarded with emails from my neighbours, like this one on Saturday, after gun shots sent all the birds in my garden screaming up into the air:
Today around lunchtime an intruder into xxx and xxx’s home was chased off by 24/7 who responded immediately to an alarm going off. They were shot at, and unfortunately didn’t catch the person, mainly because they couldn’t get into the property. Nothing was stolen, and nobody was at home at the time. xxx subsequently has given the guards a remote so that they can enter his property. 24/7 helped him to get his electric fence fixed afterwards.
And this one this morning:
These is no doubt that all security companies are reporting an increase in crime in the past month. Zoo Lake and Emmarentia Dam muggings are on the increase as well as vehicle thefts and house robberies. Vehicles most prone to theft at the moment are VW Golfs and Polos. We would urge you to become increasingly vigilant and aware of your surroundings at all times. Keep your windows and doors locked at night. If the gap in your burglar bars can fit a small child through, you are at risk. Be vigilant if you are waiting in your parked car for any reason. Be aware of meter reading dates for electricity and gas. Monitor the health of your pets: a case of dog poisoning in Emmarentia was reported last week. A case of dog poisioning is often followed by a house break-in.
Dear God in heaven, where is this country going?
I may just have a heart attack anyway.